Most Los Angelenos are not from Los Angeles. As most urban centers are, the city’s citizens are a mish mash of cultures and people from across the nation and world. Rarely is the question “Where in California are you from?” posed to a Los Angeleno. Instead, “How long have you been in LA?” is the more fitting question, since no one is really from here.
That being said, many of the Groups of LA are just geographical communities that have found each other in Los Angeles. One particularly surprising, innocent, and aloof group is the Small Town Airhead. These persons are a little bit Celebrastalker, a little bit Dream Big, and a little bit sorority girl: they move to LA hoping to “hit the big time,” but are too caught up in the glitz and glam of Hollywood that they never actually leave their small town mindset to graduate to something more mature and suitable for the city. Instead, they lose focus of their own aspirations and team up with another STA (or Celebrastaker or Dream Big or Worldly Frat Boy) and decide to be in awe of the city together—but never to actually make a mark on it.
This type of country mouse are usually women. They come to LA after finishing their small town college to either “get into entertainment” or “to get famous.” The ones hoping to get into entertainment studied "TV" but don't know how to actually use a camera. They settle into a talk show production job or land a healthy gig on Lifetime, before they leave the show to take care of their baby. The fame seeking STAs usually want to act or model and have wanted to since season 6 of America’s Next Top Model. They are usually hold jobs as a hostess at a restaurant and will get okay work until they leave their pursuits to take care of their baby.
This group is the type who lives in LA and still purchases Us Weekly, People Magazine, OK Magazine, National Enquirer, and like magazines. The still read TMZ on the daily and are definitely members of the Church of Perez Hilton. Now, there is nothing wrong with reading any of those publications; however, reading all these entertainment gossip magazines in Los Angeles instead of Daily Variety is like working in Paris trying to get into fashion and reading Allure, Cosmopolitan, Lucky, Self, and Redbook--instead of WWD, Vogue, Apparel News, and JC Report. The disconnect is clear.
Small Town Airheads enjoy going to Beverly Hills when they want to “go somewhere nice” or to Hollywood when they “want to go out.” They have a terrible cheese ballness to them that makes them utterly unbearable: they want so badly to live Paris Hilton's life and be her contemporary, but do not have the means or intelligence to do so. Instead, they live life how they think she lives hers, which leaves them going to the places that the girls on The Hills hang out (or the girls on Paris Hilton: My New BFF or the girls on Beverly Hills: 90210). They all end up marrying Worldly Frat Boys.
The Small Town Airhead means well but is one of the most annoying LA wannabes. They are quite depressing and really should just return to their small town instead of longing for this unattainable life. They want so badly to be a part of Hollywood, but can’t even act like a functional human being when they spot a cast member from Project Runway at their local supermarket. The STA is a sad Person of LA—even though they have no idea they are.
TOXICITY LEVEL: 8
They are pathetic, they are annoying, they are unbearable to talk to, and they just do not belong in Los Angeles. They’re a type of person that really want, want, wants but will never “get it.” They’re worse than what you may thinka Valley Girl is.
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